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Home arrow Television arrow 2013 Stories arrow Impact: Tag team action at Wembley Arena
Impact: Tag team action at Wembley Arena
Feb 24, 2013 at 06:00 PM

After the sudden, disastrous ending of the previous week’s IMPACT, it was no surprise to see General Manager Hulk Hogan out in the ring to kick things off.  After the Aces and 8s gave him another week to think about who should face Jeff Hardy for the World Heavyweight Championship, the Hulkster’s mind was made up, and the lucky man was …

Bully Ray!

Bully entered, looking just as surprised as anyone else, and promised he’d make Hulk proud.  To top it off, he suggested a blockbuster of a main event for the night:  three members of the Aces and 8s against a tag team of Bully, Sting – and Hulk.

Backstage, Austin Aries and Bobby Roode vented their spleen about Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez ruining their match the previous week.  Bad Influence – the other half of their four-man tag team for the night – arrived to advise the two former champs to just follow their lead.

Following the ads, the eight-man match was on, with Bad Influence, Aries and Roode facing Chavo Guerrero, Hernandez, Joseph Park and James Storm – a lucky dip of a tag team if there ever was one.

This broke down into a brawl almost immediately, with the heroic team clearing the ring in short order.  Once the match actually got underway, it was clear than the villains were not on the same page as each other – at one point playing a kind of tag-yourself-in version of musical chairs.

No surprise then who won – Storm and Hernandez did the heavy lifting, Chavo delivered a frog splash on the legal man, Kazarian, Joseph Park added a huge splash of his own and Chavo took the pin.

Next up, Robbie E continued to prosecute his grudge against the winner of British Bootcamp, Rockstar Spud.  Robbie was in a seriously cocky mood and did seem to have the advantage of size and experience over the UK rookie.  Spud pulled off some very nice moves including a nasty round-the-world DDT, but couldn’t get an edge over the very-tanned one.  Unfortunately Robbie E’s smugness was his undoing:  he went for Robbie T’s List, Robbie T wouldn’t give it up, and Spud snuck underneath for a roll-up.

Spud went away victorious, and Robbie E gave Robbie T a dressing-down in the ring.  Big Rob seemed determined to just staunch it out, until Robbie E decided to slap him.  Big Rob threw down The List, de-shirted … and Robbie E fled before any hilarious carnage could occur.

Time for more on-tour candid promos!  D-lo was backstage at the Glasgow show, where Miss Tessmacher and Christy Hemme had just been declared quarantined with norovirus.  James Storm has no luck when travelling.  Sting and Dixie Carter love touring.  Bully Ray knows it makes him sound conceited, but he did always expect to be successful.

The Knockouts Championship was then put up in a four-way elimination match between Tara, Velvet Sky, Gail Kim and Miss Tessmacher (thankfully over the norovirus).  Brooke Hogan watched from ringside to avoid any issues.

Right off the bat, Knockouts referee Taryn Terrell threw Tara’s boyfriend Jessie out of the arena.  If you thought that was a bad omen for the reigning champion, you’d be correct: in a stunning swerve, after Tara delivered a devastating top-rope moonsault on Tessmacher, Velvet hooked her into the In Yo Face – and Gail pushed Velvet out of the way so she could get the pin on the champ.

Miss Tessmacher was the next to fall, trying to roll up Velvet Sky - who just kept on rolling.

So it was down to Velvet and Gail.  Gail was willing to win by any means necessary, including using the ropes for leverage on her first pin attempt – but Taryn Terrell spotted the move and didn’t back down when Gail got right up in her face about it. 

Velvet attempted a very messy roll-up but settled for delivering another In Yo Face to Gail, and took the Knockouts Championship for her very own.

Backstage, Hulk, Sting and Bully prepared for their match.

Next week, TNA cameras are in Gainesville, Georgia to catch up with AJ Styles.  Will the prettiness be returning to the Impact Zone?  I hope so!

Garett Bischoff took on Samoa Joe next, to resounding London-accented choruses of “Joe’s gonna kiiiiiiiiill you.”  Focusing on Joe’s legs, Garett was not squashed as quickly as viewers may have expected; but Joe was simply not going down and Garett resorted to choking, eye-raking and general cheating.

Even that wasn’t enough, so of course Garett’s little buddy Wes Brisco ran in to add some firepower.  In turn, Kurt Angle stormed down the ramp to Joe’s rescure, and the baby Aces & 8s fled.  Kurt took a mic and called Brisco out for Lockdown – in a steel cage.

Once again Kenny King challenged Rob Van Dam for the X-Division Championship.  Once again, Kenny was arrogant and cheat-y, while RVD brought his usual calm, collected professionalism and technique.

Kenny overshot the mark with a shotgun-knees move straight into the turnbuckle, RVD pulled out Rolling Thunder and a five-star frog splash, and it was all over.  Things remain exactly the same in the X-Divison.

Backstage, Brooke Hogan tried to dissuade her father from competing.

Devon, DOC and Mr Anderson entered the ring on behalf of the Aces and 8s.  Bully and Sting likewise entered the ring on behalf of the forces of truth and justice.  Then Hulk’s music played … and played again … and the Aces and 8s jumped Bully and Sting.  Referee Earl Hebner decided for some reason that this was a great time to ring the bell, and thus the match was on.

Bully and Sting managed to take charge of events, and after a quick ad break it was Anderson vs Bully in the ring.  Devon tagged in, and with a little help from Earl Hebner’s terrible refereeing, Bully took one heck of a beat-down in the Aces and 8s’ corner.

Finally Sting managed to tag in and destroy everyone.  He delivered a Scorpion Death-drop to DOC and looked set to get the pin – until Mr Anderson intervened.

At that point, more Aces and 8s appeared, dragging daddy and daughter Hogan in with them.  Bully ran to the aid of his family, and Sting somehow got legitimately pinned by DOC – followed by another Aces and 8s beat-down.

How long will these (un)-masked men torment the superstars of the Impact Zone?  Until next week at least!

Impact Wrestling Results:

  • Chavo Guerrero, Hernandez, James Storm & Joseph Park def. Austin Aries, Bobby Roode, Christopher Daniels & Kazarian
  • Rockstar Spud def. Robbie E
  • Knockouts Championship:
    Velvet Sky def. Tara (c), Gail Kim and Miss Tessmacher
  • Samoa Joe def. Garett Bischoff via disqualification
  • X-Division Championship:
    Rob Van Dam (c) def. Kenny King
  • 3-on-2 Handicap Match:
    Devon, DOC & Mr Anderson def. Bully Ray & Sting & Bully Ray
Saturday, April 19
- WWE Raw (10.15am, the BOX)

Sunday, April 20
- WWE Raw (3.45pm, the BOX)

- WWE Main Event (6.15pm, the BOX)

- WWE SmackDown (7.05pm, the BOX)

- WWE Main Event (11.50pm, the BOX)

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